Sunday, March 27, 2005

America's Problem Nobody Will Talk About

There's a problem in this country that nobody wants to talk about. It's part of each day that everyone faces, or better yet feels. There is a simple vaccine for this epidemic, but few want to change their ways because it has been all they've ever known. For some, it's awkward to even acknowledge, but everyone will have gone through it during their lifetime. It's time for a wakeup call and I'm just the person to do it. What is this easily curable plague that has made its way to every state of the union?

Too many Americans are going to sleep on uncomfortable bedsheets with low thread counts.

There, I said it and had to get it out there. Take a look at your sheets right now. If you've got 400 or more, this post will only serve as a reminder to your darker days, when you didn't know where to go for help nor how to stop yourself from going to bed on low quality sheets. The good news is there are many stores, both offline and on, that will gladly take your money to assist you. Try taking solace in my heartwarming and motivational story of today. It will help you see the wrong of your ways and the greatness that is before you with the right prescription.

I didn't do much with myself today and I'm proud to say that I'm not ashamed. In fact, I will use any opportunity I have to be a lazy hermit for the day. Sure I really have to go food shopping, visit the dry cleaners, file some papers, and make an appearance at the post office, but the reality is those can be done later this week.

I usually have enough motivation and energy to get errands done, let alone exercise, but I washed my light green bedsheets yesterday and put some fresh, clean, and soft light blue sheets on the bed. These super-soft sheets are my kryptonite to getting anything done. One of the best things in life is sleeping on a fresh set of sheets, and of course, my 400 thread count sheets from Linen's N' Things have this magnetic pull on me to which I will gladly succumb. Let me tell you (since it's my blog and I can) I couldn't wait to go to sleep.


When I wokeup, the softness of the sheets kept me in bed for about 2 hours until my stomach reminded me it was time for breakfast. I bumbled around the apartment the rest of today until I purposely made the mistake to go back to bed just as I was about to start exercising. To nobody's surprise, I took a little catnap for about 45 minutes and it felt great.

For the uninformed, a sheet's thread count refers to the number of horizontal and vertical threads in one square-inch of fabric. While some people argue the sheet's fabric and finish determine softness, manufacturers argue thread count is the key. The truth probably lies somewhere in between. No matter, my set of 400 threads has the feel I need.

These sheets are one of the best purchases I've ever made. Back in college, I had your familiar, average, and bland 200-250 thread count sheets. Thread counts say a lot about your age so everyone back then had sheets on the lower end. Being a (mature?) mid-20's member of society that I am, it was time for an upgrade so I went to 400 and haven't looked back. Compared to my current sheets, the ones back in college were sandpaper, and who wants to waste a day on those.

I am aware that there are much higher thread counts, though I'm just not ready for them at this point in my life. I mean, that's a big commitment that I just can't make right now. I really haven't had these sheets for too long and upgrading to even 600 threads would be too much to soon. You have to let things happen naturally. Yet in honor of full disclosure, I dream of the day when I'm at a point in my life for 1000 thread count sheets.

For now, 400 threads make me want to go to sleep or just stay in bed a little while longer. If you aren't up to 400 yet, please get help as soon as possible, you don't need to sleep uncomfortably anymore.

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